Ambiguous

Feb13,2011

Just a day before the Valentines Day, I made the most horrible mistake ever.Things just went beyond my control and I tried my best then, but nothing could be done.The most unimaginable and abominable thing happened in our lives.We hit the roadblock and nothing could be done.

The consequences were bad.I took a few days to recover and get back to my normal life.I so wanted you badly then.I wanted to say sorry,but that wouldn't undo what had already happened.You were at your place,under caring hands.Me,on the other hand was drifting away in your thoughts.

As the days went by I only became more anxious.Sitting idle I would think of the days I first met you,our outings,the time we spent together,the time spent with our friends and a what not!I kept inquiring about you through my sources and I was assured that you were doing well,slowly recovering and in no time you would be yourself,again.That was one huge relief for me, but I only wanted you to get back to me.

Friends,acquaintances and all those connected to us called me for support.We all started missing you very much but there was nothing we could actually do.We waited and waited,just to see if anything would happen in the days to come.I only kept striking off the calender, counting the days, just hoping if I would see you ever again.

A few days earlier I got the news that a lot has happened in the past two months and we might never meet again as you may find a new place and move on.That day I was distressed to the depths.

Looking at my dejected state,friends and family offered me support.They said that life was such that we tend to loose people and things we love at some point of time or the other.That was some convincing, but I couldn't get over you.You were etched too deep into my heart to be erased.

Finally it was my father who acted.He met those caring hands of yours and did his best,like any father would.He didn't wait and think of what was to come but he knew what I wanted.And it was reasonable enough.

Unknown of the above fact,I got a call later in the evening that you were finally coming home.I was very frozen for a moment,digesting this fact that we were meeting finally.I ran downstairs and started waiting for you at the gate.

There you were!Gleaming with the aura you posses,sparkling eyes,gliding along-firm but silent,beautiful and bit of a stunner !We finally meet.My joy knew no bounds and I went crazy all over the place.Your name was on my lips and I told every soul alive on the earth of your home coming.Everyone had a reason to be happy then.

Now that we are back together again,I assure you that never in my life will I or even let anyone else cause any harm to you.We shall dodge and kick any harm coming our way and continue our smooth journey towards our destination.

With love

--->KN

Well.Though the fact is that my lover can't read/hear/see things by herself,my touch is something that she can feel for sure.

Dear readers.Thanks for patiently reading through the post but it might annoy you that I have just personified my car as my lover.And it might further add to your annoyance that it is a 15 year old Maruti 800(Fondly called as 'The Beast or 'The Jag')'.It has always been part and parcel of my life and has it's share of the minuscule success I have had in my life to-date.

Next time you see one white Maruti plying on the roads of Hyderabad,shining,looking brand new,and the numbers on the license plate adds to 9 ,and you feel that it's travelling a bit beyond it's engine capacity given it's age and you also feel that the driver is rash,feel free to catch up and knock on my window to say Hi!

A silent witness to the moist eyes...........

It was the usual lunch time rush. The place was full of people of all kinds. White collars, students, teenagers, friends in groups, couples....everyone. Creaking chairs, mobiles, footsteps, the constant chatter, the printer, the food counter, the door, the air conditioners, the LCD in the background...everything living and non-living had its share of noise in there.

A person sitting there and looking around could see people with all kinds of emotions mankind ever knew. The white collars had the frowns on their faces, teenagers were laughing away, a few couples were sulking, some smiling and some even fighting. Some never wanted to be there, some never wanted to leave. A few were anxiously waiting for others; a few wanted others to leave. Someone was savouring the delicacies while someone else was trying to keep the food from falling apart.

In this 'jungle' away from everyone sat a girl unnoticeable. She was preoccupied in her own world, staring at something unmindful, her thoughts pre-empted. She looked fair, simple and beautiful. She sat with her legs crossed, and her hands crossed and resting over the uncrossed leg. She sat rigid, not moving an inch of muscle in her body. For a moment anyone would think that she was one of the beautiful wax statues from Tussads; if not for a shining droplet of tear hanging precariously on her eye lashes, slipping away, loosing its hold, finally giving way to the weight and eventually dropping in front of her on the table only to splatter into hundreds of unnoticeable droplets.

The wetness in her eyes disturbed the thin black lining on her eyes, forming a smudge. It was only after another tear which started running down her cheek did she move, wiping it away and getting back to her senses. She adjusted herself and looked at her phone on the table which said something about waiting for someone.

A few minutes later the obvious He walked in. He looked like an aftermath of a hangover, someone who just sobered up. He went to her directly; maybe it was their usual place. She looked up and their eyes met. He sat down looking at her, her eyes following his all the while. He mumbled something like a Hi and she replied a faint tone.

He started talking, something which seemed to be an explanation. She kept looking at him, with the glistening eyes which looked weak and swollen from what looked like a very painful experience.

She followed every word of his, never loosing the eye contact. He was frantic with a stern voice audible but not clear enough for someone sitting a good distance from them and his hands making all kinds of motions in the process occasionally looking at his phone. She just kept listening to him without any interruption but for an 'O' with her lips with a 'Shhh....' signalling him to calm down or a momentary frown making her eyes smaller.

She looked hurt but he didn't look apologetic.

He was done talking after a while, slamming the table softly his body language saying that he wanted an explanation from her.

They were calm for a second. She turned away from him straightening her back, leaning forward and keeping her hands on the table.

It was her turn. She wore the same calm expression even while talking to him, never looking away from him. She started leaning forward talking fast, becoming firmer with her voice her hand motionless all the while. He started becoming uncomfortable, pulling himself up on the chair with his hands on the table, looking all over the place, fidgeting with himself and tapping his mobile. He occasionally tried to speak up, but in vain only uttering mono-syllables.

She didn't take long. She didn't seem explanatory either. He looked defeated, unable to find any answers. May be she did win, but he didn’t lose in her view.

Silence prevailed yet again.

He slowly inched his hand forward, resting it on hers. She slowly turned her hand and took his hand in hers gripping it tightly. They bent their heads down saying the three words to each other.

Back in their heads, deep in their hearts none of them wanted this ever again..........even the silent witness sitting away from their view........

--->KN