Sunday, June 6, 2010

A random post.......................

"I'm coming!I'm coming!"

I hung up.Atleast Sneha was coming.She is one person whom I can rely on always.Lateef was busy at office and Sravya had someone coming home for lunch.

I wanted to get new specs.Well that's what personifies the nerdness in me.I wanted someone to do the selection for me so that I don't get something which puts me really out of place.

I had to pick her up from her clients place which was right opposite lifestlye."The gate right after the signals!Don't miss it!".She warned me.I started from home
15 minutes later in the afternoon sun.The heat wave after the torrential rain left many indoors.

A few moments later my phone started vibrating.My guess was that it's Sneha calling up to say that she had work,leaving me to my own fate.I pulled the phone from my pocket only to see a call from some unknown number."Thank God!".I switched on the loudspeaker and held the phone in my hand.
Anonymous:Hello.Is it Kilash Nath??
Me:Sorry ma'am.I'm a student.I don't need any policies.Thanks for calling.And my name is not Kilash.It's Kailash.
Anonymous:I'm calling from XYZ coaching center.We have a demo class tomorrow at 10.30 a.m
Me:I've been there yesterday for the demo session.Thanks for calling me.
Anonymous:But that was a recorded session.Tomorrow it's a live class.We are expecting you tomorrow also.I will call you in the evening again to give you a reminder.
Awesome!How about giving me a wake up call tomorrow!
Me:Sorry maa'm.I've got work tomorrow.I'll see if I can make it.
I hung up before the lady said something.

Now this is what I call a slice of bad luck.The Hyderabadi cop caught me on the phone moments before I hung up.I always wondered how they could look into a car with the tinted windows pulled up.He stood right on the path signalling me to pull over.Look around!Try to evade him!My mind was screaming! There was nothing I could do.I surrendered.
Cop:Why do you talk on the phone while driving?
Me:As if you care!Nah.I'm not talking.I was listening to songs.See I have got no stereo in my car.
Cop:Aisa kyun bolte saab!!!Aap tho baat kar rahe the!Bada saab udhar hai.Fine badado.
Me:Arre.Main bhi gaana gaa raha thu.Phone pein baatein nahi!
Cop:Aisa mat bolna saab!Fine badadho.
Me:Jaldi bolan.Jaane ka time hora.Kitna?
Cop:200 rupaye dedo aur chale jao.
Me:Fine badha doonga.Receipt dedo.
Cop:Final baat!Ek sow rupaye.
I opened up my purse.I thought that it was a fair deal.I had no hundred rupee note with me.
Me:Change nahi hai!Kya karoon!?
Cop:Woh paanch sow rupay ka note dedo.Mein change doonga.
Awesome!Temme what else is in my wallet.I'll give you more!

Transaction complete.
                                                                  *  *  *                                                                                                                                                It was my turn at the signal and I was about to cross, when a MCH van from the other side crossed my path,stopping all the vehicles on my side.I edged forward again and this time there were two bikes jumping the signal.A dud policeman was standing over there.He shouted at me "Woh log jaarena!Dekh nai sakte!?"
This time I decided that I shouldn't loose.I shouted "Tera baap ka road hai bey gaandu!?Signal dekh nai sakta bey!?" and sped away.I forgot Sneha's warning.I missed the gate.

I pulled over to the side,put on the parking lights and messaged her "Was busy shouting at d police walah.Missed the gate".Moments later she replied "Have seen u miss it.M cming."

She arrived two minutes later.I was observing her from the rear view mirror.The almost 6 footer(5'11'' to be specific) look great as usual.She was wearing a yellow salwar kameez with nice design on it(that's the best description of the dress I can give).She was carrying herself with that air of authority which commands respect and which reflects decency.Her impeccable dressing sense complete with her penchant for nail polish made her one complete teenager.The looks were attracting the pedestrians and two wheelers.

I opened the door for her from inside.

"Kailash I feel so ackward sitting here!" The leg space wasn't sufficient.So I adjusted the seat a little.We started talking random stuff.Literally everything.I'm always comfortable with her(and even around the other two mentioned above.They rock!).

We reached the optical store,stopped the car in the valet parking and walked towards the store.The store welcomed everyone with "Frames starting at Rs.395 only".
"Welcome Sir!How do I help you?"
I told the guy that I wanted to get the eye testing done and a new pair of specs made.The guy there told me to select the frame of my choice in the mean time as another customer was getting his eyes tested.

"Wat kinda stuff are you lookin for?"
"Frameless "
"Yeah.Good decision."

We started looking around.First the price tag,then the frame."2.5K,2K,3K,3.5K,3.8K,5K,7.2K,9K,10K,11K!What kind of people would wear these?!"
"Whats your budget?"
Just before I was about to react,Sneha spun around and shouted "Is there anyone to help us out or are we left for ourselves!?"
The guy who told me to look around came to us.He asked me for the type of frame I was looking for and when I told him what I wanted,he grabbed a frame from the display and started twisting it.Literally.
"Sir this is from Hugo Boss.Made with Titanium.Very light in weight and very flexible.Definitely a good choice."
I took it from his hand and looked at the price tag and gave it to Sneha.
"10K?Does anyone buy stuff like this?My budget is 2K.I want to get everything made within that range.Do you have that stuff or not?"
The guy smiled and led us to another counter and started pulling out frames for me to try on.
"Is this the stuff you have?Or do you have anything else?"
He turned away from the wall display and rotated a portable stand which was right behind us.
"Try this blue or the red one.They look awesome."
"2K?I still need to get the lens.On top of it there is VAT on this!"
"Kailash.Can you please stop it.It's just a matter of few hundred buck.It's worth spending it."
"I think this black one is good.It costs 895 only."
"The glasses are too big."
"Sir we can get the glass cut to your specification."
"OK.So can I get this type of glass in this frame?",I asked him holding the 2K one and the 895 frame in both my hands.
"Yes Sir that's possible!"
Optimal utilisation of resources for maximum satisfaction.
We were asked to wait for the eye test.Apparently the customer was having a problem deciding whether she found 0.5 better or 0.75 better.

We got back to talking again.After a good five minutes she called the guy and said "Will it take forever?We'll only end up talking here.In the mean while why don't you tell us about the different type of lens you have?"
The guy sat down on the chair facing us and took out a sheet of paper which had a form on one side and which was plain on the other side.
"Sir there are basically three types of lens we offer.Nikon,Kodak and our very own brand of lens.Since you are goin for frameless,I recommend Nikon SLR for you sir.It is 95% unbreakable,is smudge proof,has light transition of 97% and has an anti dust coat too".He went on and on about it and finally said "This costs 2750 and comes with one year warranty."
Before he moved on to the next brand we asked him "Can you please tell us about the cheapest anti-glare lens that I can get here?"
"Sir you can go for our brand of lens which costs you 650.But the thing is that it is 50% breakable and has got 95% transition of light"
"What difference does it make in two percent?"
"Sir it makes a lot of difference!"
"I don't care!All I want is an anti-glare lens."
"Sir you please fill up this form.We can get your test done after this."

After filling up the form I called him.He came,took it from me and said "Sorry sir,we have a power cut right now....."
Screw you!You don't even have a power backup!!!???

We walked into the bakery next door.
Sneha looked around and said "I've never been here.This place looks good!"
She wanted to have a paneer puff.Then she walked towards the pastries section and stood there.A small pastry with a voilet topping looked attractive.
"What is this?"
"Blueberry cheese cake"
"Whatever.I want one."

 There was a couple standing to our left were deciding what to eat.The guy had a hair styling which was originally intended to look dandy but which eventually ended up as a blunder.He had large round eyes which I thought would pop out if he opened his eyes really wide and his upper teeth were protruding forward.He wore a branded casual shirt(bare denim),branded jeans(wrangler),a decent watch and had a high end phone.He looked lost talking to the guy over the counter.The girl on the other hand was fair but kinda looked them.Both of them I feel belong to the category 'all-I-need-is-a-girl/boy-friend' types.
"I want that",the girl said pointing to some coloured pastry.
"How much??"
We were stunned for a moment!(Da!)
"52 rupees"
The boy turned towards the girl and mumbled something.All that we could hear was '52'
Both of them walked out.
"What kind of a boy and what kind of a girl!And how dumb is the girl not to carry any money just because he is there to pay!"

I went to the counter and took the coupon.Sneha was standing and looking at the different cakes on display.There was a particular cake which was round and fully white in colour.On the top,there were thin rectangular slices of chocolate lining the perimiter of the circle like a fence.In the middle there was lot of chocolate in lumps filling up the area inside the fence.
"Doesn't that look like cow dung??"

"Hello.Busy?OK.Listen.How do I end this post?"

"What are you talking about!?Your blog!?How can I guess??"

"Oh yeah.Alright.I'm writing about all the things that happened yesterday"

"Why?What's so interesting in that?Moreover there are much better thing you can write about."

"Don't ask me why.I was bored in the tax class.So I took out my phone and started typing it out.It ended as a big post"

"What happened to the Part-II of your story??"

"That will be out in a day or two.First temme what to do with this post."

"Dude.That's your blog and your post.Write what comes to your mind.The readers are at your mercy"

"Hmmm....k.Will do something.Anyways wassup..................


P.S:For those who are wondering what the story is,here is the link

And for those who are waiting for the next part of the story,all I want to say is that it will be out in a day or two.My tax classes are getting boring day by day.

1 comment:

So....What do you think?